Saturday, March 31, 2018

Redefining Strength

I posted these two pictures on Instagram yesterday to support a strength challenge by a yoga instructor I admire greatly, Dianne Bondy. In the post, I mentioned how my yoga practice is redefining what strength means to me. I'd like to elaborate on that here.

If you're reading this and aren't connected to me via social media, let me preface this by saying that I lost a dear friend to suicide yesterday. He lost his battle with PTSD and was the LAST person I'd ever expected to lose that battle. He was, without question, one of the most inspring and motivating individuals I was privileged to call my friend. In the past several years, I've buried way too many people for this reason...and it literally crushes me emotionally. 

In light of yesterday's loss, as well as thinking about the suicide crisis in this country, I felt compelled to elaborate on how yoga has begun to redefine strength for me...and MAYBE we, as a society, could consider reexamining how we define strength also.

I know I will probably mess this up a bit, but I'm speaking solely from my heart here. See, yoga isn't just about poses. It's also the simple awareness of your body and all it's abilities and limits, your breath and the mind-body connection. It's about finding balance, not just in a pose, but in your being. Thanks to Cerebral Palsy, my physical body does not allow me to get into most traditional shapes/poses, but because I have the knowledge of the intention of the pose, I can almost always find a modification that will satisfy the intention. That said, I also have to be mindful of what my body is capable of that day. Some days I may be able to do some standing poses...other days, I may not. AND THAT'S OK. Physical strength does come from working on certain poses, such as this high/low plank pose that I do on a wall. But for me, the REAL strength is coming from learning when to push, but also when to pull back.

See, I used to see it as a sign of weakness if I couldn't push through something. It's only been recently that I've learned that pushing through when my body isn't ready to handle it is damaging. I had to lose my mobility to figure that out. (Most recently, I injured my hip for that very reason...trying to make my body fit into a pose it wasn't ready for!) The same thing applies to my brain. I can be the most stubborn person in the world and really dig my heels in at times (I know...shocking! LOL!), but through my yoga practice, I have learned that if I just stop resisting, things come easier...physically, mentally, even spiritually. It takes real strength to acknowledge where our limitations are AND to accept them graciously.

Recognizing our strengths, as well as our limits, finding the balance in the two, and knowing when to ask for help, is the REAL strength that I believe we don't help people focus on enough in this country. It's always about striving for more, pushing harder, keep up with the Joneses, etc. ...and let's not forget the "shoulds" that society places on us. That's a lot of pressure for anyone. And I'm just as guilty of all of these!

I'm going through Yoga Teacher Training currently...and even if it only makes me a better student...if I never share this gift with others, it's been worth it for that. But I don't want to stop there. I want to share this gift with people not just to hopefully help them feel better in their bodies, but to maybe experience the kind of strength and balance I'm experiencing. Maybe to share some tools to help others find some peace. Personally, I incorporate my Christian faith into my practice and it has made a dramatic difference in my spiritual walk.

I don't know what the answer is, I don't even know how we do it, but I believe that this world needs more mentors...more people encouraging each other to not just "push through" but to really listen to what's going on inside themselves and help them discover their unique gifts as well as their personal "line in the sand" and when to ask for help.

This suicide crisis has to stop. Period. It starts with one person reaching out to another...being strong enough to be vulnerable and share your story. I'm saying now that I'm always gonna be that person. If my life can impact someone else, then that's what this life is all about for me. 

Strength doesn't have to mean being the best physically, mentally or spiritually. Sttength comes from within...and I think we need to do a better job of helping each other find that strength.

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